hampeh!

nnt la ye layan tag tuh abg amin oi!

tunjukkan aku

Musik dari jiwa
Lagu dari hati
Cerita sepurnama
Canda dan menangis

Belum ku selami
Caturan terjadi
Lelah dipukul badai
Apa mungkin terlerai?

Oh...

*Soalan tersendu
Balas hampa bisu
Tuhan, tunjuk sesuatu
Apa dia yang satu itu?

Tunjukkan aku
Tunjukkan aku

Chorus:

Apa bisa ku cinta
Kamu seperti mana
Aku dicinta kamu?
Aku dijaga kamu?
Atau kamu terlalu
Indah buat diriku?
Beda dari diriku?
Aku pun tak menahu

(Repeat *)

(Repeat chorus 2x)

Aku pun tak menahu
Aku pun tak menahu

Apa bisa ku cinta?
Apa bisa ku cinta?
Apa bisa ku cinta?

Tuhan, tunjukkan aku

ready, on your mark, get set, GO!

its unbelievable thinking time flies so fast you wish you could turn back time. its exactly how i feel when i'm typing this entry.

as i'm typing -while listening to some bands do their magics on mtv-, i'm repacking my bags. throw away the stuffs yang ngarut2 and pack all the necessary stuffs. come to think of it, the thrown away -tak buang laa,simpan balik dlm almari- macam important je. ahaks~ aku tak reti packing barang i mean, what should be in the bag and what not. basic stuffs tak pyh ckp, aku taw! tp yg complementary tuh. huhuhu. anak dara pe la ni?

i afraid of leaving something that matter the most while i'm there and keep in mind, kat bota tuh BUKAN kulim. at least kulim dekat la gak ngan perlis. naik bas pun senang. huhh-sigh- tp what is life without sacrifices right? worr. byknye barang aku nak bawak nihh. nak pindah ke trus ke?
huhuhuhu.

ptptn tak settle lagik. nyampah tul call. xreti nak angkat.

happee befday! to me...

yay! berumo 18 gak aku akhernya!

gumbiranya!!!
ahaks~




aku gumbira!!

bawalah daku pergii..

brg2 dah 3/4 packed. xcited pun dh ada nihh. cuma benda yg tak beli lagi je yg tak packed.

petang td arep belanja makan western food kat d'sena. he picked me up and then we went to yatie's to amek her then off we go to d'sena. lawak tul time lepak2 tadi. byk adegan yg tak sempat aku nak rakam. hahahaha. what can i say, my wallet dah berperisa fresh oren waktu balik tuhhh.ahaks~ -cmne la ang pegang gelas arep oii!-

saat aku menaip entri ni aku ngah blurr. *dah tuh watpe taip?

td aku gi umah abg zani *my cousin- ade wat makan2 sikit. tu la keje aku. makan, Makan dan MAKAN!
gemok la aku. *ternyata, impian dan doa noor amin akan menjadi kenyataan! siot tul-

dah tak tau nak taip pe..
nnt la aku pikir len..

p/s-
happy bday! yay!

save you

Take a breath I pull myself together
Just another step until I reach the door
You'll never know the way it tears me up inside to see you

Ooh Ooh
I wish that I could tell you something
Ooh Ooh
To take it all away

Sometimes I wish I could save you
And there's so many things that I want you to know
I won't give up til it's over
If it takes you forever I want you to know

When I hear your voice it's drowning in the whispers
You're just skin and bones
There's nothing left to take and no matter what I do
I can't make you feel better

Ooh Ooh
If only I could find the answer
Ooh Ooh
To help me understand

Sometimes I wish I could save you
And there's so many things that I want you to know
I won't give up til it's over
If it takes you forever I want you to know that

If you fall, stumble down
I'll pick you up off the ground
If you lose faith in you
I'll give you strength to pull through
Tell me you won't give up
Cause I'll be waiting if you fall you know
I'll be there for you

Ooh Ooh
If only I could find the answer
Ooh Ooh
To take it all away

Sometimes I wish I could save you
And there's so many things that I want you to know
I won't give up til it's over
If it takes you forever I want you to know

I wish I could save you
I want you to know
I wish I could save you 

countdown

hari ni tarikh 22dec. sok 23. *yay!

i havent packing ANYTHING yet. siang tadi mak dah tanya. but yes, aku tak packing hape pun lagik. even baju. ahaks~ nak p ke tak aku nih?

nak kata barang tak cukop, semuanya ada except few things yang boleh beli last minute. cepatnya masa berlalu. aku rasa cam baru je quit poli semalam. tup tup dah nak pegi pulak. xcited+rama2 in da stomach pun ade gak nihh. cuz aku di-warning-kan oleh mmber2 yg merangkap senior2 aku kat sana yg minggu MMS (orientasi) bakal menguji mental n kesabaran aku. aku cam "ye ke?". lorrr. nurmal r tuh kan? lama mane seminggu tuh? *i'll regret saying that, mark my words.

tp yg aku suka sekalik, leh pakai jeans! ahaks~ sluar2 aku byk jeans. so, tak cam kat poli dulu, nehi kabhi nehi. klu jumpa dek mak guard n pak guard, mampos disuruhnya aku balik change.

dgr citer dak2 UiTM masuk balik 28dec. so, minggu MMS aku dijalankan tgh khalayak ramai laa. abehlaa. huhuhuhu. harap there's no raging thing. abg2 aku leh r nak buli2 aku, tapi org len, nehi kabhi nehi laa.

p/s nak tgk TWILIGHT. tp panggung xd kat perlih nih. member2 jum pi a.staq!

wifi dan aku

ahaks.
semalam itu jiran off lagik dia punya wifi. aiyook dokter, jgnla itu macam.
ahaks.
maw dia taw pebuatan aku yg agak terkutuk nih, mampos aku kena beeep! beeep *action kamen!

time aku typing entri nih, aku ngan mak wif ayah *naim is tidur-ing beside are watching 'live' mawiekin nikah. sambil2 tuh, ade la komen komen tak diundang kuar esp mak.ahaks. semalam aku discover ema n naak antar our class pic kat mag remaja (lisa surihani as the covergirl *siyes dia lawa, *noor amin @ mohd naim, sila tackle buat jadi kakak ipar aku =p) and it's in the latest issue. teruja aku cuz muka aku agak clear dlm pic tuh. ahaks. poyo!

hari ni mak cakap byk kenduri. that's it, i'm not going. oo..ngan panas kat luar, nak siap2 lagik, nak kena makan lagik *dah le aku ngah gumuk. nanti la musim aku rajen sikit, aku gi la. dah le aku pakai inai, klu siap lebeh nanti, org tersalah pengantin lak. ahaks *bapak perasan! date registration UiTM is around the corner, few days away *so does my special day!- tp aku tak prepare pe pun lagik. packing pun tak lagik. sepatutnya aku dah start nih. cuz si iskandar bukan kulim. mane leh tinggal2 barang. yg aku taw, 3beg besar mmg akan jd load keta proton saga ayah aku tuh.

err..aku tak mandi lagikk!
ahaks. *pe nak jadi ngan anak dara ni! ok.


ye mak!
nak pi mandi la nihhh!

mawi ekin kawen?

ade aku kesahh?
pedulik la.

hahahahaha.

satu je, jgn ikut trend semasa ye!


*abg aku bila lagi?

abby norman cerai?

pedulik hape aku?
hahahahaha.

twilight!

kenapa perlih xdak cinema?
pliss!
aku keboringan dan ketinggalan. bingung tul!



edward cullen!
kewl!

p/s.
abg amin! klu ada ongkos, novel twilight by stephanie meyer satu ya? ahaks

photo session

abg noikh starting to perasan yg dia model malaya masa balik hari tuh.
teruja dek kamera naim, dia telah menjadikan hari harinya di perlih negeriku ni sebagai hari photoshootnya. and lucky me, naim yg jadi mangsa photographer. thank god! melayan kerenahnya yang kalah naomi campbell tuh membuatkan aku terpikir 8juta kali nak sign up him as model. ahaks. *tak termasuk aset terbarunya, perutt..ahaks. yg tak bestnya, they're using my room to get somewhat passport-like pics. bingung tul. memanjat katil aku pastu suh aku buat lighting.

pastu, terfikir kat mata ayer, umah tok, the view is quite priceless cuz umah kampung still banyak kat area tuh. pe lagi, abg amin sebagai driver, abg noikh as the perasan nak mati model, naim as 'gil bensimone', kak nana, lala, arfan and not to forget, me yg nak gak bergambar =p, we're off to mata ayer. *mata ayaq!

kat sebelah ni kat umah tok. it was taken right after kami sampai. aku ngan naim selalu said between both of us. if we're damn rich *kena usaha utk tu! rumah tok ni akan kami upgrade jadi umah kayu yang siyes lawa. banyak gak planning kami dua. ahaks. but insyaAllah, in God's willing. who knows?
then, we went to the railway. kat situ view pun mengancam. naim komplen yang petang tu dia datang dua kali cuz earlier that petang, he took his friends for some photoshoots too. sape suh. ye tak?
nasib la takde train. cuak gak. aku ni bab tempat tempat merbahaya memang cuak selalu. aku cepat pikir bukan bukan. penah gak aku suarakan ke-cuak-an aku kat member2 satu ketika dulu, pas kena sound aku jadik simpan je ke-cuak-an aku tuh. huhuhu. bukan pe. aku mmg seorang yg cuak!

ni time kena kutuk direct ngan model perasan!

memeluk tiang *cambest je tiang tu hari tuh

then, kami gerak gi RFC, new fast food restaurant kat depan our neighbourhood. lepak situ. kutuk mengutuk sesama sendiri dan kutuk kedai gak. ahaks. siann RFC tuhh. tak pasal pasal.

yg sayangnya, gambar satu family tak amek pun? ye tak?
bial yg sulung tuh dah blah balik spore, baru sebok komplen takdak gambar family? pe laa..

buhsan

aku dah bosan
aku dah bosann..
ahaks..

we lie we cheat we steal

this entry is neither for fun nor serious matter. its a subjective.
well, we all got our own point of view, dontcha think?

i'm writing this in MaNglish. sorry! nanti senang nak sampaikan pe yg aku ngah pk.
as mentioned above, lie aka cheat aka tipu.

aku menaip entri ni bukan sebab pe? beberapa hari ni aku teringat seorang yang penah
aku anggap kawan who used to cheat me a great deal. aku lak sememangnya seorang
kanak kanak naif lagi lurus bendul. penipuan dia tuh agak aku takleh terima cuz i was
very sincere to him. caring, and others sampaikan sesorang time tu amat amat cemburu.
-seseorang?-

everything that came out from his mouth is a total lie. and i dont wanna think bout it
no more. he used to get in touch but i didnt reply. bukan tak memaafkan cuma serik!
i forgive him already. so, move on and i act like kami tak penah kenal. aku bukan nak
jadi pendendam atau pe, tp mmg aku tak boleh dah nak kawan dengan dia.

i'm not saying yang aku tak penah tipu, in fact, the whole world does. cuma, bila kita
ditipu, mesti rasa macam di-betray je kan? i know yang aku pun bukan malaikat. tapi, face it,
you cant deny that lying can be betrayal to others.

have you been cheat before?
agak2 pe la penipuan yg paling takleh korang terima?

kadang kala, penipuan itu 'bukan' satu 'kesalahan'
sekadar 'menutup' kebenaran
cuma it'll be better
if
kebenaran tu yang diucap
biarpun pahit
tp at least takde la gelaran 'penipu' terlekat kat belakang baju kita.

by the way,
prank bukan menipu ye.
itu for fun!
memain!
ahaks~
cuz yg pasti, aku suka prank member2!
yea (^_^)

kenangan terindahh..ahaks

err..
adakah jiran ku -if you're in the family, you know who- telah berjaya mengesan yg kami telah hacked wifinya
tanpa permission? aiyookk. BUSTED!

ahaks

ala.
kasi can laa!

ni yang boring tahap maksima ni. nak men internet, hapdet pe yang patut tapi takleh. time aku ngah tulis nih,
mmg aku tgh hacked jiran aku punya wifi la ni. ahaks. jahat gak! tapi klu guna komputer umah, mmg slow giler
b*** la. leh bingung aku nnt. by the way, abg noikh left home to kl oredi. well, that's not the frontpage! a
couple hours before leaving, arfan bit me! sakit siot! siap berbekas merah lagi. dari jauh pun mak aku nmpak!
naseb la dak kecik lagi gumuks cam aku tuh anak sedara aku. klu takkk~ ahaks~

dia geget aku kat bahagian atas lengan. pandai tul dia tinggalkan kenangan sementara nak tunggu next year jumpa
balik.hahaha. hebat tul dak kecik ni. tapi jgn la sampai ikut jejak papanya yang kurang asam lagi huduh perangainya tuh. suka2 ati mencalitkan bau ketiak kat hidung aku. siot tul la. hahahha

dahla.
camne la aku nak ilangkan bekas geget nih? nnt org igt luvbite lakk.

friendship

frankly i said i missed all the friends i was very close to back when i was in National Service. and now, my miss 'pocket' is added with my poly buddies. rindu nak lepak lepak ngan ifah, bellamoih and syud. we're very damn close. turun kafe together gether.ahaks. bilik v4-127 tuh memang bilik rasmi aku utk lepak2. huhuhu.

well, for me, friendship amat amat berharga. no man cant live by himself. aku sebelum ni banyak menangis sebab kawan kawan. i admit. even aku leh duk sorang sorang, but i can only survive by having a friend on my side. (bab family tak masuk cuz tajuk utama friendship ye.amek perhatian!) fresh lagi in my living memory, i cried cuz kena pulau dek kawan kawan atas sebab satu kes yg tak dapat nak dinyatakan kat sini. time tu jugak, aku kerap tak gi sekolah. duk umah je. tapi last last aku bangun balik. so, i survived in my high school life. but i still love my friends back at kigs. lagipun, time sekulah kan budak budak lagi.

then here came national service. here, i got so many friends yang i appreciate sgt. we're laughing, joking with each other and did lots stuffs together gether. memang best sgt. of coz la, kat mane2 pun akan ade yg tak puas hati ngan kita, but come to think of it, macam mana nak build self confidence if kita syik nak jadi diri kita berdasarkan kemahuan org lain. jadikla diri sendrik kan? teringat my bro once said, idop ni jgn dengaq cakap org, kalau tak, memang takkan puas la hidop kita. rite? sampai sekarang aku still contact ngan member member plkn. jauh dekat tetap contact.

next, polytechnic. kat sini aku memang agak culture shock la gak cuz aku jumpa banyak jenis spesis manusia yang jarang ditemui. banyak betul perangai and kerenah. tapi kat sini jugak aku dapat member yang best lagi kewl. kira leh buat geng la. ahaks. especially DPR1A. iffah, syud, bellamoih, naak, shila and others. memang happening lah! plus senior senior yang rajin tego, buat lawak.

for me, biar seburuk mana pun kawan tuh, if we ada give and take, tolerant mmg semoi. lagipun, ada untung ke musuh musuh nih? aku tak suka buat musuh. for me, klu ada yg tak suka aku, boh layan je. nak wat camner, if they dont like me, then i can do nothing bout that. tak kenal maka tak cinta. tu je.aku punya banyak teman teman yang sengal lagi cam nak hempok je pale, tapi aku jugak jenis pemaaf. klau ada orang leh terima kelemahan aku, pe salah aku belajar accept people as who they are.rite?

so, sape nak jadik kawan aku?
angkat tangan!!

makan lagikk!

whoaa.
nak diet hapenya?
td dah makan besaq!

hahahaha. just now we had an awesome dinner. ikan bakar with tomyam and sotong tepung goreng with few other extra dishes. yummy! memang sah aku tak boleh diet kat umah ni. gumuks! hahahaha. well, dinner like this one hanya ada jika :
-abg noikh's home
-birthday smbody
-celebrate pe pe?
-adek beradek mai umah
-poket ngah penohh!

earlier, LaLa was brought to the hospital cuz her maktok concerns that she's coughing non-stop even when sleeping. for a 4 year old kiddo, mmg cam alarming ja. dah sampai umah, makan ubat la kanak kanak tuh. siang tadi we went to our kampung ( meself, abg amin (driver), naim (photographer), abg noikh wif kak nana n the kids ) Mata Ayer. kampung ni agak best cuz still ada ciri ciri kampung. cuma development yang semakin ber+ membuatkan all of those will be replace with concretes. plus, in few years, there will be no more yard in front of rumah tok yang lawa and penuh bunga raya yang cantik catik ( various colours )cuz the gomen gonna build a flyover. umah tok dekat ngan railway so, nak buat flyover so that takyah kena stop keta dah kat railway tu nanti. for me, i dont recall any nostalgia except knowing there was a barber place near the house, kedai apek yang selalu jadi mangsa untuk kami beli stuff yg tak cukup bila bertandang kat sana. i remember when arwah tok ada, mak suh aku tido kat sana teman tok. during those times, sejuk giler pagi pagi. and arwah tok susah payah siapkan aku, masak untuk aku. cuz aku budak lagi time tu. such wonderful memories.

now, umah tok hanya digunakan kat tingkat bawah je. tingkat atas dah kosong. urm. i'm thinking that if i can afford it in the future, memang aku akan renovate umah tok supaya jadi umah kayu kampung yang cantik and semua family gathering buat kat umah. angan angan besar sungguh. insyAllah, berkat dengan usaha, tak salah utk berangan, kan?

we went there to have a photoshoot since abg noikh mula memerasankan dirinya. i took advantage too. ahakz!
plus naim tgh mengexpresikan dirinya sebagai seorang photographer.

after that, we went to RFC. having snacks and lepak lepak. pastu balik. then ayah took abg noikh and his kids of cuz, kak nana too to Kuala Perlis. aku tak ikut. tido. hikhikhik. patutla lemak banyak.

and now, aku ngah lepak wif my bro amin dalam bilik.dua dua duk berharap wireless jiran yang kami hacked ni tak tutup lagi. ahakz. jahat gle hacked hak org.

haaarrrgghh
ngantuknya.

nnt la sambung lagik.

i'm chubbier!

gosh.

its been long since last post. well. living at poly without owning a notebook makes me katak living bawah tempurung. plus, the favorite links have been blocked by the wi-fi -camne la nak hapdet-. well. worry no more. i'm back to pick up the pieces i've left since few weeks ago.

sorry for keeping you guessing where the hell i've been m.i.a. *abg amin toksah wat taktaw.

first, announcing to the world, i've quit studying in poly. alhamdullillah. after lots of views, thoughts i decided to go after my dream. well, i dream of becoming a designer since primary and now, getting the chance to do it, it'll be better if i go for it. right? i still gonna miss poly. 6months is not a short period i must say. its a chapter in my journey called life for used to be a marketing student.

next, saving the drama for the soaps, i'm getting chubbier! arghh. gumuks. fatty meri saathi. in other word, i'm making my brothers more happier than ever to call me budak gemok again. suckss.
hahahha. i cant deny that i've been eating quite a lot back when i was in poly. gambar kat sebelah is my image before enroling into ptsb. mungkin time ni dah nampak aku chubby sikit but believe me, at this moment, i can wear my jeans perfectly fit and there was no trouble while wearing it. no inhaling exhaling happened. kira kurus gak laa. makan pun jarang time nih. bukan jaga badan tapi tak lapar *alasan!!. however, abang2 aku still panggil aku budak gemok padahal member2 banyak cakap aku kurus * hikhikhik.

and this one. is the latest me! gosh. barangsiapa tak nampak, kena la jumpa optometris. hikhikhik. and now, i cannot wear my jeans without inhaling and exhaling session. argh. yeah! i'm gonna start diet! DIET! tapi boleh ke? aku diet? -lariiii!dunia nak terbalik!- i've never been on diet before and never planning or even intending to diet also. haiyaa. how to become kurus again maa? makan julap? buang segala toksik dalam badan ni dan tinggal sehari semalam dalam tandas? err. katakan TAK NAK. so, kena xtvate balik body ni. dulu i'm quite athletic. sukan gak la. but now, makan tak ingat dunia. no wonder chubby. sekali makan bantai habis. tak kasi can punya. hahahahha. tambah-tambah aku ni pemalas. *nnt ada la komen yang bakal agree dengan statement ni* i knew itt! well, nak deny watpe? kan abang abang ku sekalian? - i know you guys are reading this!-
well, all in all, i cant wait to embark on new life kat UiTM. bukan sekadar mengejar status pelajar Uni - cuz i got a friend and i really sick of him yang bangga sangat being student Uni while i was in poly- tetapi mengejar cita-cita yang kini terbuka luas peluangnya. and thanx so much to my bros for buying me this NEC VERSA E6300. syukran jaazila ya akhi.
i've got the best brothers in the world and wont trade them for anything. *ermm..klu emas, permata??

well, i wonder how was it gonna be if i'm sitting for my finals and rejecting UiTM. cuz i once said to a friend of mine, " aku dah menyampah ngan uni kat malaysia ni".

that response was due to rejection from ipt on july intake before this. thinking friends yang dapat masuk thru orang dalam adalah unfair and i got rejected even from poly at that time - i got poly after appeal- memang hati terbakar la. lu bikin gua pannaaaaas * bak kata spark dlm rempit.

forget that! i got this chance on my own effort and there's no one gonna stop me reaching it *unless meself*. girl powerr! ahaks. terpengaruh nagn chickflick r nih. aiyook.

till then.
i'll be writing soon.